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Ever since the beginning of time, complaining has been used for everything from assignment of blame, to getting some sort of resolution.  If you don't believe me, read in the Holy Bible, Genesis, and note Chapter 3, the fall of man, and the complaining that ensues, or Chapter 4 where the failure to complain effectively leads to catastrophic results.

In today's age, we have had the opportunity to learn from others.  Using our observational skills, it is possible to gain the most results, with the least amount of blood boiling, and keep from burning our bridge of relationship to others.

Key #1 - Information Gathering - In order to effectively complain about something, you must first get the highest quality information.  Getting an account from someone who was not there is all but useless to an effective complainer.  Seek out someone who was actually there, and has first-hand knowledge of the event.  If the situation is still ongoing, take the time to go personally observe it.  Being one of the actual witnesses helps to complain immensely.  Other times you will hear something shocking about another person.  Rather than repeat a statement that may or may not be true, tactfully confront that person face to face.  Complaining with false information as a basis is not only ineffective, but it makes you look bad.

Key #2 - Be Objective - Sometimes, it is possible when complaining to introduce subjectiveness into your complaint.  Thoroughly pounding how "terrible" it is only brings in emotional elements.  These elements make the other person want to break off the conversation as quickly as possible.  Remember, you're not looking for therapy, but for results!

Key #3 - Be Factual - When making a complaint, use real facts, and avoid terms that are unable to be proved.  An example to follow:  "I visited your store on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday this week, each time at 7am.  You appeared to be out of coffee already.  What is the problem?"  An example *not* to follow:  "Every time I come here, you have no coffee!"

Key #4 - Keep Records - Often, hazy memories can really take the steam out of your complaint.  How many times have you called a company, the person on the other end appeared to both understand our problem and offer to help, only to find later they did not do it?  Later, you call back, complain, and when asked for the name of the person you spoke with, you do not remember.  In the computer, there are no notes about the conversational points you're complaining about.  Track who you are talking to, the dates you talk to them, the phone number you dialed, and menu options you used to get them on the phone.  It sounds like a lot of work, but a simple bit of note taking can really cut through the fog, helping you to get the results you want.

Key #5 - Follow up - Before ending a conversation with someone, ask when the best time to follow up would be.  If they can give you a case number, even better.  People tend to work better knowing there is a deadline.  By allowing them to set their own deadline, you hold the upper hand since they cannot complain about how short of a deadline *you* set on them.  The real trick is, when no results are visible, you have to follow up!  Consider how it looks when you call back months later to complain about something that should have been done in a day or two.  It looks like you really didn't care if it was done or not.

Key #6 - Identify Goals - Before filing a complaint, identify the real problem, and what you really want out of it.  Asking for (and getting) congressional funding for road improvements may feel satisfying, until you realize none of that money went to fix the pot hole in front of your driveway.  Be sure to include the specific thing you want in your complaint.  Sometimes suggesting a researched plan of action can help.  Maybe the person you are complaining to is willing to help, but has no idea how to effectively fix your problem.

Key #7 - Talk to Authorities - While you may find a sympathetic ear with the the checker at the grocery store, this person is ill-equipped to help with your chronic water company problems.  Be certain when you complain, that you first complain to the person who caused your problems, and then next to someone who is in authority over them.  The purpose of this is two fold.  If the person did not even realize they caused a problem for you, then they have been given a chance for redemption.  Additionally, when complaining to the authority over them, it gives you extra ammunition, assuming you kept records (Key #4), and followed up (Key #5).

Key #8 - Be Understanding - At some point in your life, you will fail.  It is inevitable.  When other people fail you, understand that this happens from time to time.  Give others a chance to redeem themselves, before you go Rambo on them.

Key #9 - Avoid Gossip - The last thing that will motivate people to help you is gossiping about their failures to others.  Second, third hand, or further removed from the source, gossip can get quickly tangled with many misleading and downright false statements.  Distance yourself from gossip, and it will be a lot easier to think clearly.

Key #10 - Give Credit - Many people overlook how well other people are doing, but love to trounce on any mistakes they make.  Take a few moments, and let people notice that you see their winning smile, prompt service, or quality of work.  A few good comments go a long way.

With these ten keys, go forth and complain, but complain *effectively*!